*03-10-2025*

so, it was around 12:30 am of 3rd october 2025.
i went to the toilet and smoked the leftover joint i had. i was puffing it kinda fast thinking i wouldn't get the same hit as yesterday. after finishing it, my legs started to feel heavier but i thought "eh, nothing crazy".
washed my hands, still felt pretty normal, so i told myself i probably wouldn't get the same effect again. and i was approaching towards my room thinking "duhh nothing much happened".

but then i went back to my room, and turned off the lights. only light source in my room was coming from my monitor and some accessories glowing faintly. i sat on my chair, thought of opening instagram to talk to people..
and then smth hit me outta nowhere. i felt like i slipped into some kind of realm(delusional realm), and i SWEAR i could hear and see sound frequencies. it was like the sound was forming a circular trap, like some nen user catching me lmfao. the thing is, as this frequency would make a circular warp in the back of my mind but then it would snap, and whenever it would snap i would heard this subtle scream.. a mother crying with her daughter. it wasn't loud, just faint and subtle, but is was just there. the whole thing felt like the star gate scene from kubrick's 1968 film 2001 space odyssey.
i kept telling myself "heyy, it's alright, it's just a trip, calm down" or sometimes i would panic and say things like "shi- i'm gonna die" after some time.. or maybe what felt like forever.. i snapped out of it.

i kinda got the control to my senses, but i immediately was still pretty much into it. i opened insta immediately and started chatting with friends. that moment was one of the MOST surreal things ever. it felt like i was literally in a dream.
LIKE REALLLLYY A DREAMM!!!
everything was hazy, ethereal, surreal, altered, dissociative and unreal but i was SOOOO immersed in it.
again, i got back into "slightly" better shape, tho not fully out of it.

then i thought of putting on some records or tracks. first was DOA the third and final report by throbbing gristle. man, that record felt so ethereal and surreal, but also terrifying AS HELL. i was hearing textures and details i never caught before.
after that i grabbed the shawarma i had ordered earlier, and bro.. that was the GREATEWWSTT shawarma ever!!! i'm not even exaggerating, it was just WAYYY TOO MUCH PEAK.
then i started eating that al faham chicken biryani or whatever and dude.. that was just.. like EVERY bite was a spiritual experience.

after stuffing myself i put on francoise hardy's gintonic. it was SOOOOOO delicate.
(PLEASE DON'T JUDGE ME ON THIS ONE, IK I'M DELUSIONAL ASF)
i was then seeing those graduation pictures of nikki catsouras, and in my head she looked SOOO pretty, her hair, her eyes, her smile.. everything was dreamlike. then suddenly that "that" tragic photo of hers flashed in my mind(it was blurred and foggy) and it killed the mood for a second. but then i drifted back into it. by the time the 4th track of hardy's record was on, i closed my eyes, turned my head to the left.. and suddenly i was walking with her. she was laughing, there was this light behind her body, and i was just there, walking beside her. it was SOOO ethereal, and i was FREAKIN' into it like dudeee.
i had to snap my eyes open like "woah, wtf was that?"

after that i played up swans track.. "i'm just a little boy".
i knew it could trigger a bad trip, but i went ahead anyway(i guess i was being perverse). the whole track felt like an eternity and a second at the same time. the bass was FREAKIN powerfull asf, the soundscape felt like smth very eerie-ly haunting, micheal gira's vocals felt like as if they were crawling into my body.. my head was spinning with thoughts, SOOOOOOOOO many of them, but when the track ended i couldn't remember a single one. it was uncanny as hell.

then i switched to dummy by portishead. MAAANNN.. that was trippy beyond belief.
i could feel the bass in my body, gibbons' vocals cutting or penetrating straight into ME..
the samples and textures felt so unearthly. after a while i went to the kitchen for water. turned the lights on.. everything was TOO bright, almost aggressive. and my stomach.. it got really hard, like it was churning, but i couldn't actually feel it unless i touched it with my hands, like it wasn't nauseatic at all.

later, i tried watching the film enter the void(from where i left it yesterday).
when i started the film, it was just WAYY too trippy at that stage, i had to stop.

as the high started to fade, i got into a more stable phase.
that's when i decided to play echoes live at pompeii 1971. i lay down on my bed, leaned against the wall, and when that first "ping" hit.. bro. i closed my eyes and imagined myself drifting thru the cosmos space, and it was just SOOOOO FREAKIN' amazing. it was like the star gate scene for meh!

after listening to the whole thing, i opened my eyes and went on to pee. this is what i was spamming in chats at that time:

“BROO I LISTENED TO ECHOES BY PF LIKE DUDE
I CLOSED MY EYES AND THEN KEPT ON LISTENING AND OHHHH MAAWWW GAWWDDD IT WAS SOO PEAK
DUDE I MEAN I HAD SOOOO MANY THOUGHTS GOING WHICH I AGAIN COMPLETELY FORGOT NOW
AND I WOKE UP AND WENT TO PEE LIKE MY EYES WERE SLEEPY AS HELL AND I DIDN'T TURN ON THE LIGHTS, ON PURPOSE
I WAS GETTING PARANOID BY A BLUE LIGHT AND FROM MY OWN SHADOW
THAT BLUE LIGHT CAME FROM MY HEADPHONES LMFAOOOOOO
I MEAN BROOO IT'S SOO CRAZYYY”

that was definitely my most favorite listen of echoes ever.
the greatest one by far. on gawd.

after this i went on to sleep, i knew i had done smth last night, and started checking my chats and SHIT, i texted ALOT of people..
03-10-2025 will be truly remembered. this high was WAYY more intense than 2nd oktober high.